Im not sure of any civilization clone that is not so violent but Civilization 5 is designed to more simple and user friendly.
But might i suggest Anno 1404. When i played this, It had a big feel of civilzation to me but it plays in real time and focues more on economy and city building/design although there is a combat aspect it involves many ship to ship battles, but land battles not so much as war is not one way to win the game.
There is a demo of it on the internet, however the game may also be called Dawn of Discovery.