The primary IDE connection is usually the blue IDE connection on new motherboards, if you look closeley most motherboards will probably have a label saying which is which.
However your laptop takes a SATA hard drive, SATA is the sucessor to IDE so your pretty much out of luck for the harddrive softmod, its very unlikely your laptop will also have an IDE connection.
From looking at the American eBay ive found the Action Replay memory card which lets you download / upload saves to it:
XBOX Action Replay MAX FREE 8MB MEMORY CARD Brand NEW - eBay (item 270579637015 end time May-22-10 19:17:37 PDT)
Its $27.50 though which is almost $20 more than a normal memory card.
That memory card should be perfect for getting a hacked save for the game of your choice on to the Xbox's hard drive, then its a case of getting a copy of an exploitable games such as Agent Under Fire, Splinter cell or Mechwarrior, loading the save and installing the exploit.
If you just got a normal memory card I would offer to put the exploit of your choice on it, however to post it to the UK and back to America would probably end up costing a lot more than just buying the Action Reply from eBay.
Ive attached the readme from the 007 exploit I use, it should explain how everything is done, if you dont understand any of it just ask. The process should be similar for which ever game you use.